Ten Sure Signs You're A Walking Nut (p.116)
1. You have seven pairs of knee-length woollen socks of which two come in sunset red.
2. You can prepare a cheese and tomato sandwich with just one hand.
3. You wear a bobble hat, but only as a post-modern statement.
4. You tie plastic bags around your boots when you enter a pub.
5. You swap blister stories like an army veteran.
6. You don't just know that dock cures nettle stings, you actually know what dock looks like.
7. You an tell the difference between a chiffchaff and a willow warbler without even hearing them sing.
8. You paper your walls with old OS maps.
9. You once considered buying mini windscreen wipers for your glasses.
10. You know you're obsessed, but as walking is truly the greatest pleasure on the earth, then so what.
....I can say yes to just two of these things
....no long woollen socks, far too thick for walking in, though I do like the idea of red socks
....no, I don't eat sandwiches, a banana will do me
....I do usually have a hat of some sort, maybe I should invest in a 'bobble'?
....I'll take the mud in with me, sorry
....I don't get blisters, touch wood
....yes, I've known about the soothing sap of dock leaves since childhood, having spent many hours exploring, encounters with stinging nettles were inevitable and frequent
....I'd rather have the OS map with me than on my wall, makes more sense really
....I don't wear glasses
....and yes I am probably a little obsessed, another inevitability, its part of my nature :-)
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